Memorial Day message from Eli

Hey, Happy Memorial Day all love for me live. Sorry, got a little hairball. How you guys doing today. So far no rain on Memorial Day here in Northwest Indiana, we’re blessed. Hopefully your barbecue is going fine. So today’s message is not the memorial day that we’re sharing, or celebrating in America today. This is about you. What’s your engraving today? The Memorial Day is who you are supposed to be when you were born. And you haven’t quite figured it out yet, or you haven’t had the courage to live it. You know, everybody is born with a soul purpose. It’s inside of you like it’s in your soul’s DNA. There’s a code inside of each and every one of us. And what I’ve seen over the years from Soul of so many clients is nobody has what it takes to develop it. Now few do. Here’s the problem. Look at your family environment. If you weren’t raised with a supportive, helpful family that believed in you that supported you that had your back, no matter what the chances of you pulling off your soul’s purpose is pretty hindered because of that. Now, there’s nothing you can do about your childhood, you know, the families were born in, you know, some people say we pick them, I’m not sure about any of that. But you can do something about the damage it did. And then you can start living your soul’s purpose instead of sadly, and eking out a living, or a relationship, that you know, it’s not good for you, that doesn’t feed your soul that doesn’t spark your soul. We’re doing the psychodrama next two Sundays, and for the five people work in those days have daddy issues. And I’ve been looking into a lot of this lately. It’s amazing how important our fathers are to us. And even if they’re there, they could screw you up. I’ve had many clients, the dads were there, but they were pretty useless because they didn’t heal their stuff. When a father believes in you, when they support you, when they tell you you’re number one, no matter what I was looking at some music videos on YouTube this morning, I was trying to find some theme songs for the people working. And there were so many songs on there about the Father wound, and what it does, but they weren’t. And none of them really jumped out, it makes up one, I might use that. But the point I’m getting at is if you didn’t have the father that supported you and believed in you, whether you’re male or female. You know, one of the things I came up with recently is if you’re a female, you’re a puzzle piece. And the relationship you had with your dad was the other puzzle piece the body? Well, when you leave home, guess who you’re looking for? Daddy. But if it wasn’t a great relationship, that’s what you’re going to settle for. And unfortunately, all of this done unconsciously. We don’t realize we’re doing it unless you heal that wound. You know, I was talking to my brother today. He was talking to his daughter. And he asked her Has there ever been a man in your life who, who you trusted and believed in you? And she said, You dad, he was the only one. And she’s got other issues where she’s made some choices. But the point being, even though Tim was a great father, that He’s so kind and totally overcome some of what she went through in her life. I heard a story recently about a former client of mine, I’m going to have to reach out had a horrible relationship with a dad didn’t get the support, man. Well, he’s what I call a late bloomer. So what I heard recently was that he finally got his education, kicking butt in a new job, everything’s going well. But as his mentor, and mentors are kind of like father figures if you guys don’t know that, we believe in you, we support you. We see things in you that you don’t see. And we we we give that to you. Come on you can do this. You know somebody believe in you imagine if we had dads like that, that didn’t criticize us that put us down. Then it abandoned us didn’t ignore us. They make us feel like burdens. A dad that really smile when you came there. Oh, there’s my girl. There’s my boy. Right? Man, those kids feel great. Right? But if we didn’t get that, we started the marathon two miles behind everybody else. So that’s why a lot of times we don’t actualize what we’re supposed to actualize. And that’s from Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. He talks about the pyramid. Well for those earlier issues, are killed, you don’t get to go up on the pyramid to self transcendence. But this Memorial Day is for you to think about, are you grieving who you should have been? Not the soldiers who then come back. You know, except in a body bag. Unfortunately, that’s true. We read them today to, you know, thankful. But it’s really more about you. Because as I look at this world we live in the world needs us to be who we were born to be, the creator didn’t make a mistake, when they downloaded that soul code. And what I was supposed to do as a therapist, I had to fight and struggle and fight to find this, but I was blessed with so many good veterans in my early 20s, that they helped me overcome get over the hump of self doubt. Not, I can’t do this, you know, I started my therapy practice at 31. Everybody thought I was nuts. But I had all these mentors, male mentors that were supporting me telling me, Tom, you can do this, I need help, I could do that. But here it is. 44 years later, still do it. It’s still loving it like it’s Christmas every day. So this is what Memorial Day is like, for me. It’s like for all of you who have not self actualized, who have not done the healing work, because you can’t help the family. But you don’t have to settle for the crap that they gave you. You don’t have to believe it, but you got to do the work. You got to get out of your comfort zone. That little box we like to live in. Okay. My favorite quote is feel the fear but do it. Anyway, I heard that from my first therapist 50 years ago. And that’s kind of what’s been running my ship here all these years. We feel fear. Every Sunday when I do psychodrama. I have some fear, some anxiety, because I’m kind of like the director of the whole thing. Making the whole thing happen like a movie director, and I want to see good things, keeping people safe and then, okay, but I have some anxiety with that. But that’s normal, you know. And once we get started that leaves, just like when you learn to drive the car the first few times, if you had to give it into your anxiety, you’re going to be driving today you’d be overing everywhere, or taking a cabinet in the old days. So take some time to reflect on this. You don’t? Are you celebrating your memorial day to day for who you put a bet in guys and gals that’s a tragedy if you haven’t done it. Like I said, that client of mine, who’s not a young man finally, took took the skydive and he went out and did it. That can be all of us guys. You just got to do the work. Okay, and once you do the work, you will be so surprised at who you really are. You’re amazing. All right, God bless. Enjoy the cookout. Talk to you guys later.